wagwaan?

So cross with myself!

I've been dying to do a LO on my beautiful, special, wise, wonderful, smiley, clever mum... only to find that I don't have any half-way decent pictures of her. Oh sure, I have snapshots of her, pictures where she is half obscured by a child or a pet, pictures that are too dark, pictures where she is twisting round at a funny angle to see the camera - no pictures that really do her justice. I have found a few that I'm going to scan in and enlarge to see what I can get. It makes me so cross because I love her so dearly, and I love taking photos - why on EARTH didn't I ever get a decent picture of her before she fell ill?  All of you out there, especially those scrapbookers, make sure you take good portraits of your loved ones TODAY. I'm especially glad that I've got a few decent ones of me recently, so that my daughter doesn't ever have to feel this way!

The latest news from France is that Mummy is still fighting this chest infection, which was probably caused by her swallowing difficulties. The funny, laboured breathing could be due to the stroke rather than the infection. She has atrial fibrillation and is now on Warfarin - AF can cause clots, so maybe this is what happened to her, although it's a moot point now, as you can't go back and change things, can you?  When she is awake she seems quite alert, so we are praying hard for an improvement in her medical condition, and then we'll have to see what the prognosis is but she'll have a fight on her hands to regain some independence. 

I would like to thank all of you for your prayers and messages of support. It means so much to me and it is wonderful to have made so many friends thanks to the web!

God bless you all.

Can't think of a title...

Bit tearful going back to work today, because of course everyone asked after my mum... Nigel's update at lunchtime was quite positive though. Apparently she was quite awake and trying desperately to communicate, but having dinner tired her out and she fell asleep again. The nurse told them that this infection is quite severe and it will be at least another week before she's any better. My nephew Matt went in to see her, and she recognised him straight away, but he was rather taken aback by her appearance, as it is so different from her normal self. When the infection has been sorted out we all need to discuss long term arrangements, which is going to be a struggle. It's a good job there are 7 of us!!  My holiday will be in Bernieres this summer, at least for a while; partly depending on when I get a new job and can afford to go. Ho hum....

The job search is still pootling along. I applied for some jobs today, and one of the agencies called back immediately, but they need to meet me before they can send my cv to companies. The same old story. I'm sick of it!

Yesterday my neighbour lent me his strimmer, so I'm sitting here looking out at the garden and it's gorgeous. Well, the grass is under control, the bushes and flowers are blooming, and the sun is going down so dappling through the trees. Rather nice!  Must go and get the washing in and cook dinner though. A woman's work is never done!

Some photos of Bernieres

This is where my mum lives - Bernières sur Mer on the landing beaches in Normandy. I made sure I watered her plants and flowers. Especially after walking Whisky, because she goes beserk and tries to catch the spray from the hose in her mouth. She's a scream!  I thought she deserved a bit of fun, as she is very depressed and missing my mum (Whisky was found lying close by my mum's side on the day she collapsed).

This first picture is the front of the house - I love that my mum had it painted such a pretty blue!  I had to merge two photos, hence the kind of wonky effect LOL

Poor old Whisky!

View from the top step - you can just see the sea!

It's a rollercoaster ride!

Oh dear! One day good, one day not so good. Yesterday I went to see my mum early afternoon (after having been round to her neighbours Jim and Helene for lunch - so sweet of them).  Mummy was quite alert and tried to talk, and when I made the back of the bed go up, she seemed to be breathing better, and I told her so, and she nodded in agreement. Her sats were still a little low, so they put the oxygen back on, and she left it.  She was still quite sleepy, though, so I left her and went back to the house and walked the dog. I had quite a stonking headache and felt a bit sick, but I was determined to go back one more time to say goodbye as my flight home was today.  I got there and she seemed more unwell again. She had a holter monitor attached to her, and she was fidgeting with the cassette recorder it's attached to, and tried to pull of some of the plasters holding the wires down on her chest, frowning. I explained to her what it was. Put her bed up a bit again, but she was frowning and holding her back. She motioned to me to put the side of the bed down, which I did and she slid her leg and let it dangle over the edge. She obviously wanted to sit on the edge of the bed, but me, by myself, that would be an impossible thing to do. I'm hoping it's because she's fed up lying on her back and feels up to doing something new, but sometimes I can't help wondering if she's really aware... I hope it's the former!

I had a call from my uncle (my father's older brother). He and his wife had been on a pilgrimage to Santiago de Compostela this week, and while there they had mass said for my mother's recovery at the church of St Francis (which happens to be my late father's name). A lot of other people are praying for Mummy, and the power of prayer should not be underestimated. If any of you feel like doing this, please remember my mum, Pat Rigg, in your prayers, and if any of you are in prayer groups, please may I ask that you get them to pray too?  She is such a wonderful woman, and at the moment she seems a bit like a shell of her former self; however I KNOW she is determined, and she CAN make a good recovery, and I wish nothing less for her. Thank you my friends!

Better news!

Thank goodness news today is better!  Mummy was much more alert and awake for longer today. I was able to give her some 'jellied water', but after a couple of spoonfuls she took it from me and tried to slurp from the container; you can tell she is gagging for a proper drink!  She didn't need oxygen today and was trying to talk to me so I felt a lot better. After a short while, though, she made me understand not to fuss around her and basically to go home!  Which,  like the dutiful daughter I am, I did... I have a 'rustic pizza' warming in the oven and I'm off to make myself a salad to go with it. The dog has been walked (having decided she wanted to go a full hour earlier than her routine, cheeky thing!), so I'm settling down to a quiet evening of TV and hopefully a better night's sleep.   I hope Mummy has more good days and fewer of the bad ones. Oh, and how loved is she??  I am getting emails, visits, phone calls and invitations to lunch! Everyone around here loves her so much, but that is not surprising as she is absolutely the best mum ever and a fantastic woman. Must do that long overdue LO dedicated to her as soon as I get back home...