Wednesday

Still not good news. I got here yesterday afternoon and went straight to the hospital. Mummy was awake and aware, but it was a shock to see her so unwell, so I do admit to having shed a few tears, which I did not want to do in front of her. She held my hand, fingered my blouse as if to say she'd never seen it before, and was generally trying to communicate a lot. We left her after dinner, so she could sleep. Today however was a different story. Melanie and I got there at lunchtime to find her very unwell. She seemed hot and she was having a lot of trouble breathing. We were both pretty upset, but I was stronger today, and didn't cry so easily. The doctors think she has an infection of some sort, even though the chest x-ray was clear. She was taken down for an uptake scan, so we went back to Bernieres for a while. When we came back she was still very agitated and had taken her oxygen off again. Her sats were down so they insisted she keep it on but she was really fighting it, which was really distressing.She looked in so much pain. We got the Consultant called, and he spent a long time in with her. Basically, he said she needed to rest - they gave her a sedative - all the tests are negative, so she just needs to fight this one out. It is so awful feeling so helpless, but mostly seeing her in pain. I'm only journaling this so I can look back and remember, but I'm pretty sure I'll remember it for ever anyway!  Prayers are what she needs now, lots of them, while she meds do their work and she hopefully gets her strength back.

Comments

[Paula]

Sending you more hugs Jen, and I'll keep your Mum in my thoughts.

[Joy]

I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers, Jen. (((((((((hugs)))))))))))

[kihaku]

**hugs** it is hard but the rest will be good for her. sending strength & healing vibes.

[Maria]

I've been thinking of you my friend. Hope your mom is better soon!